Forget about what you've heard before ('it's not easy being green...' I can't quite recall - was that Kermit that said that? I think it was... ) I'm here to tell you that (for me, anyway) it has been SO easy going vegan that I'm pleasantly surprised!
I'm loving the fact that my tastebuds seemed to have cleaned out and I truly welcome the tastes of fresh vegetables and fruit and really (honestly!) dislike the taste of so much 'dead' food that I had been eating before... breads, pasta, meat {shudder} and other things that just had no life left in them.
I love the fact that my skin looks more radiant and my hair and nails (which always grew really fast before) now grow even more quickly!
I've been putting my KitchenAid food processor and blender through their paces on a daily basis - creating healthy smoothies and delicious entrees. My husband is really happy on our new diet as well. He's lost weight and feels fantastic.
It does require more preparation (obviously) but after trying (with very disappointing results) to go out for dinner - even when the food choices were 'clean', we have noticed a huge difference (likely the culprit is large amounts of sodium, among other things used in restaurants) so we opt to stay home for 98% of our meals now.
I'm waiting (rather impatiently) for the day when I can afford a Vitamix. I'm dying to make my own nut flours in addition to hot soups without cooking!
Until then, I continue to put my small appliances to good use and allow my creativity in the kitchen to roam free...
Eat Healthy!
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Sue's Southwestern Black Bean Soup (Vegan)
Another cold snap in Ontario... we spent my birthday at Blue Mountain (Collingwood, ON) and that week, the temperatures were around -32 c - just lovely! (NOT) Great weather for sitting by a fireplace, playing board games and having warming, comforting foods...
When we drove home again, we were both hungry and I was in too much of a rush to make dinner to have time to soak my beans overnight, etc., so once again, this was a quick soup thrown together with ingredients on hand. When I make this again, I will plan better and soak my dried beans overnight...
It's hearty and filling and oh-so good!
INGREDIENTS
3 tins black beans (do not rinse) 1/2 red onion, chopped
4 cloves garlic
1 stalk celery, chopped
1/2 large tin stewed tomatoes
1 bunch of cilantro, washed and chopped
1 tsp cayenne (optional - since I am allergic, I have to forego this ingredient)
2 tsp cumin
1 tsp turmeric
1 tsp coriander
Black pepper
2 tbsp olive oil
METHOD
In medium size pot...
Sauté onions, garlic and spices with oil
Add all other ingredients and bring to rapid boil
Turn down to minimum for 20-30 minutes
Use immersion blender to combine all ingredients before serving
Makes 4-6 generous servings ** I like to top with more chopped cilantro ;)
Sue's Quinoa, Kale/Spinach & Chickpea Soup
It's been rather cold in Toronto lately. No real snow but still... brrr... ! As much as I love to eat raw foods, I was hankering for something warm... so I decided to make some delicious soup.
I know... in a perfect world, I would not have used tinned chickpeas or purchased broth - but the world is not perfect and neither am I - sometimes you are hungry and need to use up what you have on hand!
INGREDIENTS
3 large tins chickpeas - rinsed
2 large boxes reduced sodium broth - vegetable or chicken (900ml each) 3 larger carrots, sliced
2-3 large stalks of celery, chopped
4 cups spinach, chopped (kale is good too)
2 cups broccoli, chopped
1 cup quinoa
3 cloves of garlic, minced
1/2 red onion, chopped
1" fresh ginger - sliced (2" if you want it more spicy)
1 cup parsley, chopped
1 tsp fresh thyme
1 tsp turmeric
3 tbsp olive oil
METHOD
In large stock pot...
Sauté onions, garlic and spices in oil until soft
Add all other ingredients except quinoa
Bring to rapid boil then add quinoa and lower heat to minimum for 20-30 minutes
This makes a large pot - approx. 8-12 servings, depending on size of serving
* Note: apparently this soup was so delicious, I got excited about eating it and forgot to photograph it! OOPS!!
Sue's Southwestern Black Bean Burger (Vegan)
This week, I was dying for a burger - something that was filling and could be held in a pita... I came up with these vegan black bean burgers - the recipe is a keeper! Not only are they packed with protein and good fats - they are delicious!!
You could even eat the patties 'as is' without additional cooking but the seeds toast up really nicely and I like the added crunchy texture...
Ingredients
1/2 cup black beans
1/2 cup cooked brown rice (I find it's best if the rice is cool)
1/4 cup onion
1/4 cup loosely packed cilantro - more if you have
1/2 - 1tsp cumin
Black pepper to taste
1/2 cup flax seeds (whole)
1/2 cup sunflower seeds
2 tbsp nutritional yeast
* optional - cayenne pepper would be nice (I'm allergic to it so I can't use it...)
Method
Pulse in food processor till just combined - add seeds at the end so that they don't get pulverized
Form patties (I use a patty press for consistency )
Bake, grill, fry... ENJOY!!
Makes 2 burgers
Sue's Vegan Ginger Cookies
I was hoping for a gingersnap cookie but what I ended up with was somehow better... ;) they are chewy and delicious - and satiating - so you won't feel the need to eat them all at once...
Vegan Ginger Cookies
INGREDIENTS
1 cup oats
1 cup hazelnut flour
1/2 cup coconut
1/2 cup molasses
1/2 cup coconut sugar
1/2 cup apple butter
1/4 cup almonds, chopped
1/4 cup flax seeds
1 tbsp ground ginger
1/4 cup minced ginger root
1/4 tsp cloves
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp ground black pepper
METHOD
Mix all ingredients together
Scoop using 1" size cookie scoop onto silicone liner or parchment lined cookie sheet
Flatten with wet spoon
Bake at 350 deg 15-20 minutes
Yield 40-48 two-bite size cookies
Vegan Ginger Cookies
INGREDIENTS
1 cup oats
1 cup hazelnut flour
1/2 cup coconut
1/2 cup molasses
1/2 cup coconut sugar
1/2 cup apple butter
1/4 cup almonds, chopped
1/4 cup flax seeds
1 tbsp ground ginger
1/4 cup minced ginger root
1/4 tsp cloves
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp ground black pepper
METHOD
Mix all ingredients together
Scoop using 1" size cookie scoop onto silicone liner or parchment lined cookie sheet
Flatten with wet spoon
Bake at 350 deg 15-20 minutes
Yield 40-48 two-bite size cookies
A New Year - A New Approach to Food
I'm not sure if I've ever mentioned this before but I used to be a vegetarian (like a good yogi)... until about two and a half years ago, when I started adding back animal proteins into my diet.
I'm not really proud of it, nor am I ashamed... but (hangs head) I was so desperate to lose weight after a period of not being able to exercise (another - prior - injury) that I went on Dr. Bernstein's (gasp) diet plan about two and a half years ago.
I know... I know... but you know what? It helped me to learn about portion control (I'd never had to worry about that before) and it helped me to learn how certain foods affected me (bloating... non-satiating... whatever... ). I also lost 28 lbs (when you are tiny - 4'11" - that's a LOT of excess to be carrying!) which (unlike most people who have done this diet, I am told...) I mostly kept off (give or take about 10-12 lbs recently)
All of this preamble is to explain that the reason I went back to eating animal proteins was because on that diet, I was forbidden to have grains, lentils, beans... in other words - my staple foods... it was basically, eat chicken or starve to death...
Anyhow, fast forward to December 2012, and once again I'm feeling desperate about my weight and unable to exercise (for reasons noted in my prior December 2012 post) and utterly miserable.
I asked a couple of my nutritionist friends for some help because - god help me - I was almost desperate enough to consider Dr B. again in this never-ending pelvic injury that prevents me from being active.
Instead of spending all of my money on that, I embarked (on January 2, 2013) on a '3-day green cleanse' to help me kickstart some healthier eating habits and give my system a break from the foods (animal proteins and simple sugars) I had been consuming. Besides, once again, the texture of fish, chicken and beef and become abhorrent to me and when I bit into it, I felt like I was eating a cousin... I knew it was time to be a vegetarian again.
Three days into my green cleanse, I was feeling so fantastic that I just kept on going... and so was born the new and improved me: a vegan. Trust me, I was surprised... I really thought I would miss eggs and cheese - turns out I was wrong.
SO, in true OCD fashion... I've been embarking on some new adventures with culinary delights created in my blender, juicer and food processor.
I'm really excited about some of the recipes I've created (which, unlike my fabulous non-vegan cakes and cookies) are vegan and anti-inflammatory - which, let's face it - I sorely need right now with this horrible osteitis pubis condition that I have.
So - onward!
I'm not really proud of it, nor am I ashamed... but (hangs head) I was so desperate to lose weight after a period of not being able to exercise (another - prior - injury) that I went on Dr. Bernstein's (gasp) diet plan about two and a half years ago.
I know... I know... but you know what? It helped me to learn about portion control (I'd never had to worry about that before) and it helped me to learn how certain foods affected me (bloating... non-satiating... whatever... ). I also lost 28 lbs (when you are tiny - 4'11" - that's a LOT of excess to be carrying!) which (unlike most people who have done this diet, I am told...) I mostly kept off (give or take about 10-12 lbs recently)
All of this preamble is to explain that the reason I went back to eating animal proteins was because on that diet, I was forbidden to have grains, lentils, beans... in other words - my staple foods... it was basically, eat chicken or starve to death...
Anyhow, fast forward to December 2012, and once again I'm feeling desperate about my weight and unable to exercise (for reasons noted in my prior December 2012 post) and utterly miserable.
I asked a couple of my nutritionist friends for some help because - god help me - I was almost desperate enough to consider Dr B. again in this never-ending pelvic injury that prevents me from being active.
Instead of spending all of my money on that, I embarked (on January 2, 2013) on a '3-day green cleanse' to help me kickstart some healthier eating habits and give my system a break from the foods (animal proteins and simple sugars) I had been consuming. Besides, once again, the texture of fish, chicken and beef and become abhorrent to me and when I bit into it, I felt like I was eating a cousin... I knew it was time to be a vegetarian again.
Three days into my green cleanse, I was feeling so fantastic that I just kept on going... and so was born the new and improved me: a vegan. Trust me, I was surprised... I really thought I would miss eggs and cheese - turns out I was wrong.
SO, in true OCD fashion... I've been embarking on some new adventures with culinary delights created in my blender, juicer and food processor.
I'm really excited about some of the recipes I've created (which, unlike my fabulous non-vegan cakes and cookies) are vegan and anti-inflammatory - which, let's face it - I sorely need right now with this horrible osteitis pubis condition that I have.
So - onward!
Friday, December 7, 2012
I'm Not Dead... Ive Just Had Nothing Happy to Say...
Wow... the last time I posted on here was in April. I've thought about blogging since then but haven't because, quite frankly - I've been miserable and in a very dark place.
Read at your own peril ;)
The Injury From Hell that stopped me in my tracks in March 2011, has not yet healed. In fact, things have just progressed and gotten far worse than I had imagined.
I had to stop working in April 2012 as the chronic and excruciating pain (in my pubic/pelvic region prevented me from sitting for long periods (ie. over 15 minutes), concentrating or sleeping. It had progressed to the point where I was suffering from incontinence. My quality of life felt so bad that I would literally burst into tears at work, or at home - and felt completely hopeless. I thought about blogging about it at that point but didn't think anyone would really want to read about how bleak my life felt... how I couldn't do anything that I wanted to do (yoga, swim, bike, run, walk, hike... or sit and watch a movie) and could not understand how at 46 I was suffering from all of this from what started as an insidious onset of groin pain in March 2011.
I'm a yogini - but I'm not perfect! It's wonderful to focus on gratitude however let's face it - it's not always easy... I lost that focus.
I became a miserable, crying, overreactive and pain-infused thing that couldn't stand to read the posts of others on blogs or Facebook 'I just ran 32km and feel fantastic'; 'I swam 4000m today - woo hoo bring on Ironman'; 'Ironman... Ironman... training, swimming, biking... running..." AAARGH!!!! I ended up not reading anyone's social media posts for months because I would get furious and bitter and then eventually just cry. My poor husband did not know what to do or say. I HATED MY LIFE.
Anyone who's ever dealt with mental health issues (I've battled with them for most of my 47 years)... anyone who's ever dealt with chronic pain... you will understand. It felt like my entire world had imploded.
Most of my 'friends' (not from work - my 'real' friends) - I have not seen. Many I have not heard from. I literally pleaded with some to please come and visit me or meet me for coffee or something because I was so lonely and desperately wanted some company. Did any of them go out of their way to come and see me when I could not drive my car or had no income for 2 months when I stopped working? They did not.
(I should rephrase that... a couple of women friends DID actually demonstrate true friendship and support and I am eternally grateful to them. (these are not the people I practically begged to visit me) The rest ... those 'friends'... have proven themselves not to understand the basic concept of friendship. Wow... eye opener. Checking Facebook to see whether I'm still alive and periodically posting something is not the same as picking up the phone to speak to me or even sending me an email to connect. Our society is more connected electronically than ever before but we have lost connection with one another. Gratitude flows from recognizing those who truly demonstrate friendship and support - and letting go of all others. We are all busy. I repeat... we are ALL busy... but if that prevents us from spending time with those who love us and sharing ourselves and our love - life is not worth living.
As for my workplace, I had thought that after being at the same workplace for 25 years, with many 'friends' there, I would hear from or see those people or feel supported by them. Apparently 'work friends' is a separate category for most. No one has visited. No one has sent a card. Was I bitter about that? Oh yeah... I mean, WTF??!!! I went off work suddenly and have been gone for 8 months and - nothing?? I'm forgotten just like that - I don't matter to them at all? And then I remembered, at the office I am the person who thinks of doing those things... apparently they don't get done when I'm not around. Gratitude emanates from realizing that I don't need to spend so many hours at the office on my own time...I don't need to be the 'perky' girl in the office who takes in fresh baked cakes and cookies and is quick to volunteer for the jobs others don't want.
I came off work thinking I'd be gone a month to relax and focus on rehabilitation and be all better. Not so. I've worked through treatment for a (?) sports hernia, (?) adductor tear, calcific tendonitis of the adductor and now possibly osteitis pubis. I'm no further ahead.
I went to physiotherapy faithfully (those people are my rock(s) - they continue to support me) and then had surgery to repair a (diagnostically unconfirmed) sports hernia on August 1, 2012. Here we are on December 7, 2012 - surgery was not successful. My surgeon wished me well and saw me on my way and that's that. Apparently the surgical site is healed and solid however - I am right back where I started 2 years ago. I'm not exaggerating. My pain has not altered or shifted. It's still chronic. It's still very, very painful. I still cannot participate in any of the physical activities I love. My 'exercises' at physio involve walking in the therapeutic pool... (sigh)
I've had 6 platelet rich plasma (PRP) injections - they did not work. I've had months of physiotherapy to try and stabilize my hypermobile pelvic region. The pain continues. I'm now on crutches to see if non-weight bearing on the left leg helps things along. Crutches SUCK. I'm clumsy. I've tripped an elderly lady, whacked others in the shins and been completely astonished by the obliviousness of the general populace - having doors slammed in my face as I hobble close to them... people looking at me like I'm a huge annoyance for being in their way as I try to shuffle through a shopping mall... Unbelievable. I cannot imagine how, for instance, a person in a wheelchair navigates through life surrounded by our society... another eye opener. Another chance to practice gratitude. I am so grateful that I can walk. I am not bound to a wheelchair or hospital bed. I can see. I can hear. I can feel. I can love.
Next up is a CT scan to see if they can confirm osteitis pubis. I hope so because if so, my fabulous sports specialist says he can treat that. If not, I have no idea what will happen next.
I no longer plan anything physically active for the future. I can't see the future... I have no idea whether I will still be completely sidelined in another 3 months, or 6 months... because this has gone on for so long and so far nothing has cured it. I just want the pain to stop. I really want to be active again.
So... now that anyone who took the time to read this (thank you) is probably thoroughly depressed and wishing I'd hurry up and sign off... here's what I've learned:
- I can immerse myself in photography and capture the beauty and the life that surrounds us - and then for a time, I am at peace
- my photography website is now up online www.suesitkiphoto.com - check it out :)
- I've learned which relationships are worth cultivating and nurturing and work at being a good friend to others
- I've observed that most/many people are so self-involved they are missing out on what could be a much richer life experience... and that is sad
** As 2012 comes to a close, so does this long-winded post... Truly, each day I do try and find gratitude in the little things that matter in life and not focus on the things that are not going the way I had hoped or planned. Some days it is very difficult to do that. I am lonely. I miss 'playing' and laughing with others. I am deeply saddened because I feel so left out... however my wonderful hubby and my good friends love me and I love them. And that is what really matters in this life.
May 2013 be a happy new year - for all of us :)
Read at your own peril ;)
The Injury From Hell that stopped me in my tracks in March 2011, has not yet healed. In fact, things have just progressed and gotten far worse than I had imagined.
I had to stop working in April 2012 as the chronic and excruciating pain (in my pubic/pelvic region prevented me from sitting for long periods (ie. over 15 minutes), concentrating or sleeping. It had progressed to the point where I was suffering from incontinence. My quality of life felt so bad that I would literally burst into tears at work, or at home - and felt completely hopeless. I thought about blogging about it at that point but didn't think anyone would really want to read about how bleak my life felt... how I couldn't do anything that I wanted to do (yoga, swim, bike, run, walk, hike... or sit and watch a movie) and could not understand how at 46 I was suffering from all of this from what started as an insidious onset of groin pain in March 2011.
I'm a yogini - but I'm not perfect! It's wonderful to focus on gratitude however let's face it - it's not always easy... I lost that focus.
I became a miserable, crying, overreactive and pain-infused thing that couldn't stand to read the posts of others on blogs or Facebook 'I just ran 32km and feel fantastic'; 'I swam 4000m today - woo hoo bring on Ironman'; 'Ironman... Ironman... training, swimming, biking... running..." AAARGH!!!! I ended up not reading anyone's social media posts for months because I would get furious and bitter and then eventually just cry. My poor husband did not know what to do or say. I HATED MY LIFE.
Anyone who's ever dealt with mental health issues (I've battled with them for most of my 47 years)... anyone who's ever dealt with chronic pain... you will understand. It felt like my entire world had imploded.
Most of my 'friends' (not from work - my 'real' friends) - I have not seen. Many I have not heard from. I literally pleaded with some to please come and visit me or meet me for coffee or something because I was so lonely and desperately wanted some company. Did any of them go out of their way to come and see me when I could not drive my car or had no income for 2 months when I stopped working? They did not.
(I should rephrase that... a couple of women friends DID actually demonstrate true friendship and support and I am eternally grateful to them. (these are not the people I practically begged to visit me) The rest ... those 'friends'... have proven themselves not to understand the basic concept of friendship. Wow... eye opener. Checking Facebook to see whether I'm still alive and periodically posting something is not the same as picking up the phone to speak to me or even sending me an email to connect. Our society is more connected electronically than ever before but we have lost connection with one another. Gratitude flows from recognizing those who truly demonstrate friendship and support - and letting go of all others. We are all busy. I repeat... we are ALL busy... but if that prevents us from spending time with those who love us and sharing ourselves and our love - life is not worth living.
As for my workplace, I had thought that after being at the same workplace for 25 years, with many 'friends' there, I would hear from or see those people or feel supported by them. Apparently 'work friends' is a separate category for most. No one has visited. No one has sent a card. Was I bitter about that? Oh yeah... I mean, WTF??!!! I went off work suddenly and have been gone for 8 months and - nothing?? I'm forgotten just like that - I don't matter to them at all? And then I remembered, at the office I am the person who thinks of doing those things... apparently they don't get done when I'm not around. Gratitude emanates from realizing that I don't need to spend so many hours at the office on my own time...I don't need to be the 'perky' girl in the office who takes in fresh baked cakes and cookies and is quick to volunteer for the jobs others don't want.
I came off work thinking I'd be gone a month to relax and focus on rehabilitation and be all better. Not so. I've worked through treatment for a (?) sports hernia, (?) adductor tear, calcific tendonitis of the adductor and now possibly osteitis pubis. I'm no further ahead.
I went to physiotherapy faithfully (those people are my rock(s) - they continue to support me) and then had surgery to repair a (diagnostically unconfirmed) sports hernia on August 1, 2012. Here we are on December 7, 2012 - surgery was not successful. My surgeon wished me well and saw me on my way and that's that. Apparently the surgical site is healed and solid however - I am right back where I started 2 years ago. I'm not exaggerating. My pain has not altered or shifted. It's still chronic. It's still very, very painful. I still cannot participate in any of the physical activities I love. My 'exercises' at physio involve walking in the therapeutic pool... (sigh)
I've had 6 platelet rich plasma (PRP) injections - they did not work. I've had months of physiotherapy to try and stabilize my hypermobile pelvic region. The pain continues. I'm now on crutches to see if non-weight bearing on the left leg helps things along. Crutches SUCK. I'm clumsy. I've tripped an elderly lady, whacked others in the shins and been completely astonished by the obliviousness of the general populace - having doors slammed in my face as I hobble close to them... people looking at me like I'm a huge annoyance for being in their way as I try to shuffle through a shopping mall... Unbelievable. I cannot imagine how, for instance, a person in a wheelchair navigates through life surrounded by our society... another eye opener. Another chance to practice gratitude. I am so grateful that I can walk. I am not bound to a wheelchair or hospital bed. I can see. I can hear. I can feel. I can love.
Next up is a CT scan to see if they can confirm osteitis pubis. I hope so because if so, my fabulous sports specialist says he can treat that. If not, I have no idea what will happen next.
I no longer plan anything physically active for the future. I can't see the future... I have no idea whether I will still be completely sidelined in another 3 months, or 6 months... because this has gone on for so long and so far nothing has cured it. I just want the pain to stop. I really want to be active again.
********
- I can immerse myself in photography and capture the beauty and the life that surrounds us - and then for a time, I am at peace
- my photography website is now up online www.suesitkiphoto.com - check it out :)
- I've learned which relationships are worth cultivating and nurturing and work at being a good friend to others
- I've observed that most/many people are so self-involved they are missing out on what could be a much richer life experience... and that is sad
** As 2012 comes to a close, so does this long-winded post... Truly, each day I do try and find gratitude in the little things that matter in life and not focus on the things that are not going the way I had hoped or planned. Some days it is very difficult to do that. I am lonely. I miss 'playing' and laughing with others. I am deeply saddened because I feel so left out... however my wonderful hubby and my good friends love me and I love them. And that is what really matters in this life.
May 2013 be a happy new year - for all of us :)
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
It's Been Awhile...
... since I posted anything
... since I was able to run (with the exception of a few 3k runs in November... it's been 13 months!)
... since I was able to sit on my bike saddle, let alone go for a ride (4 months)
... since I was able to swim
... since I was able to enjoy my yoga practice
... since I've seen the inside of my office (I'm off work)
It seems that I do indeed have a sports hernia aka athletic pubalgia... aka complete and total pelvic dysfunction that keeps me from being able to sit for longer than about 5 minutes, makes driving horrible and ( it feels like my adductors and most of my left groin area is being ripped apart...) prevents me from doing any and all of the physical activities that I love... and which keep me sane (most days).
Three specialists later, I have surgery booked for July 27th. It cannot come fast enough. I'm still awaiting two MRI studies as well... just to make sure that nothing else is torn, broken, or otherwise capable of rendering me useless for any longer than necessary after post-surgical recovery.
I have passed the point of sitting and crying (well, mostly... but I still have my moments - just no longer daily) and now consider my thrice weekly physiotherapy visits my new training sessions.
Today I was able to water run. In the shallow end. For five minutes. It was not pain-free... However, I choose to say "I RAN TODAY" (that's called self-delusion, folks...) ;)
Following my water run, I was able to swim. Two strokes. With a flutter kick. Of all of the sports that I miss, it is lack of swimming that breaks my heart the most. I waited 40 years to learn how and now that I can swim... I am terrified that I will completely fall apart if I take time off from the pool. Flutter kick is just about impossible right now and so is swimming with a pull buoy between my legs... aargh! However, I choose to say "OH GOOD, I HAVE NOT YET FORGOTTEN HOW TO SWIM" (I think that is called desperation)
Today I was able to sit on a physio ball and while maintaining good pelvic stability, lift one leg at a time from the floor. Not overly dramatic, I know... and yet, I choose to say "WOW, MY CORE STABILITY IS IMPROVING" (actually it is - I couldn't do that last week...)
I'm so lucky that I have a great physiotherapy clinic with fantastic staff who really care about their clients. I love them all dearly. I also wish I did not have to see them quite so often ;)
I look forward, with great anticipation, to the day I can get up early and hit the pool with my friends (I miss them terribly) and ride my beautiful bike (even if it's on the trainer) and go for a (gasp) 5k run... until then, I'm reading, blogging and generally trying to keep myself as well-conditioned as possible, prior to surgery in 3 months.
This lack of training has given me the opportunity to work on my baking and sugar craft... I even started a new blog dedicated to that - Adventures in Baking - http://suebakes.blogspot.ca and you can see a selection of my sweet creations posted there... because behind every cake, there is a story... Maybe by the fall, I will be able to bake myself a cake to celebrate my return to an active lifestyle... :)
... since I was able to run (with the exception of a few 3k runs in November... it's been 13 months!)
... since I was able to sit on my bike saddle, let alone go for a ride (4 months)
... since I was able to swim
... since I was able to enjoy my yoga practice
... since I've seen the inside of my office (I'm off work)
It seems that I do indeed have a sports hernia aka athletic pubalgia... aka complete and total pelvic dysfunction that keeps me from being able to sit for longer than about 5 minutes, makes driving horrible and ( it feels like my adductors and most of my left groin area is being ripped apart...) prevents me from doing any and all of the physical activities that I love... and which keep me sane (most days).
Three specialists later, I have surgery booked for July 27th. It cannot come fast enough. I'm still awaiting two MRI studies as well... just to make sure that nothing else is torn, broken, or otherwise capable of rendering me useless for any longer than necessary after post-surgical recovery.
I have passed the point of sitting and crying (well, mostly... but I still have my moments - just no longer daily) and now consider my thrice weekly physiotherapy visits my new training sessions.
Today I was able to water run. In the shallow end. For five minutes. It was not pain-free... However, I choose to say "I RAN TODAY" (that's called self-delusion, folks...) ;)
Following my water run, I was able to swim. Two strokes. With a flutter kick. Of all of the sports that I miss, it is lack of swimming that breaks my heart the most. I waited 40 years to learn how and now that I can swim... I am terrified that I will completely fall apart if I take time off from the pool. Flutter kick is just about impossible right now and so is swimming with a pull buoy between my legs... aargh! However, I choose to say "OH GOOD, I HAVE NOT YET FORGOTTEN HOW TO SWIM" (I think that is called desperation)
Today I was able to sit on a physio ball and while maintaining good pelvic stability, lift one leg at a time from the floor. Not overly dramatic, I know... and yet, I choose to say "WOW, MY CORE STABILITY IS IMPROVING" (actually it is - I couldn't do that last week...)
I'm so lucky that I have a great physiotherapy clinic with fantastic staff who really care about their clients. I love them all dearly. I also wish I did not have to see them quite so often ;)
I look forward, with great anticipation, to the day I can get up early and hit the pool with my friends (I miss them terribly) and ride my beautiful bike (even if it's on the trainer) and go for a (gasp) 5k run... until then, I'm reading, blogging and generally trying to keep myself as well-conditioned as possible, prior to surgery in 3 months.
This lack of training has given me the opportunity to work on my baking and sugar craft... I even started a new blog dedicated to that - Adventures in Baking - http://suebakes.blogspot.ca and you can see a selection of my sweet creations posted there... because behind every cake, there is a story... Maybe by the fall, I will be able to bake myself a cake to celebrate my return to an active lifestyle... :)
Monday, February 27, 2012
Spring... is that you?
It certainly looks and kind of feels like spring out there!
I just got contacted with respect to my availability to photograph different racing events this spring and summer - running and triathlon events. It's got me all excited to get out and cheer and photograph (and ring my cowbell really loud... who am I kidding?? - that's my favourite part)
Not everyone can wield a long lens, hand-hold a camera AND ring a cowbell at events... however I've devised a way of doing this: I attach it to myself! If I wear it around my waist, all I have to do is 'shimmy' a little and it jangles! Festive, huh?
I get laughed at a lot but always being one of the last finishers in a race, I know just how much that added enthusiasm can help get someone across the finish line.
I'm dying to go out and RUN... Oh. My. God. I really really really really really wish I was able to run... or even be able to sit on my beautiful Guru - even if just on the trainer... sigh... hopefully not much longer...
I have to wait 2 more weeks to find out whether or not surgery will be the option of choice to 'heal' this stupid and painful pelvic injury (I hope... once and for all). Till then... I'm going to try and be patient and hone my photographic skills... or something.
I finally baked myself a birthday cake (one month late) so I guess I'm cheering up a wee bit... ;)
I can't believe how fast the time is flying by - soon we will be outside biking again (well, some people never really stopped this year... it hasn't been much of a winter in Ontario...) but better than that... (yes, I know... not all of you are this enthusiastic about swimming but...) OPEN WATER SWIMMING WILL START UP IN... 3 MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!!! I, for one, cannot wait :) There is nothing like swimming in a lake!
Hope all of you are enjoying this mild weather and that your training plans are going well...
I just got contacted with respect to my availability to photograph different racing events this spring and summer - running and triathlon events. It's got me all excited to get out and cheer and photograph (and ring my cowbell really loud... who am I kidding?? - that's my favourite part)
Not everyone can wield a long lens, hand-hold a camera AND ring a cowbell at events... however I've devised a way of doing this: I attach it to myself! If I wear it around my waist, all I have to do is 'shimmy' a little and it jangles! Festive, huh?
I get laughed at a lot but always being one of the last finishers in a race, I know just how much that added enthusiasm can help get someone across the finish line.
I'm dying to go out and RUN... Oh. My. God. I really really really really really wish I was able to run... or even be able to sit on my beautiful Guru - even if just on the trainer... sigh... hopefully not much longer...
I have to wait 2 more weeks to find out whether or not surgery will be the option of choice to 'heal' this stupid and painful pelvic injury (I hope... once and for all). Till then... I'm going to try and be patient and hone my photographic skills... or something.
I finally baked myself a birthday cake (one month late) so I guess I'm cheering up a wee bit... ;)
I can't believe how fast the time is flying by - soon we will be outside biking again (well, some people never really stopped this year... it hasn't been much of a winter in Ontario...) but better than that... (yes, I know... not all of you are this enthusiastic about swimming but...) OPEN WATER SWIMMING WILL START UP IN... 3 MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!!! I, for one, cannot wait :) There is nothing like swimming in a lake!
Hope all of you are enjoying this mild weather and that your training plans are going well...
Friday, February 10, 2012
What Are YOU Training For?
It feels like spring in Toronto. We've seen highs of 9 degrees celsius - in February! The sun has been shining, the sidewalks and roads are almost dry - and not a speck of snow... feels rather weird but at the same time it makes me think "SPRING IS COMING! SPRING IS COMING!!"
Granted, I'd be more excited about that if I could actually get out and run (or cycle) but I'll take what I can get at the moment... for the time being it's nice enough to open up the windows, sing along with the radio (loud!) and dream that I am flying along the sidewalks and roads under my own speed (instead of in my car).
Apparently we are going back into a deep freeze tonight with -20 temperatures but somehow in my heart and mind, spring is already here :)
So... with that in mind... my determination to train hard (with rehab) for my return to triathlon training is in full swing now. I've been experiencing about 50% less pain this week so I'm full of smiles and happily doing my band exercises at home and at work... getting some interesting looks from people as I practice balance drills in my cubicle... I'm now kind of optimistic that perhaps by April I will be back on the road to some degree of triathlon-related activity.
What are YOU training for?
Granted, I'd be more excited about that if I could actually get out and run (or cycle) but I'll take what I can get at the moment... for the time being it's nice enough to open up the windows, sing along with the radio (loud!) and dream that I am flying along the sidewalks and roads under my own speed (instead of in my car).
Apparently we are going back into a deep freeze tonight with -20 temperatures but somehow in my heart and mind, spring is already here :)
So... with that in mind... my determination to train hard (with rehab) for my return to triathlon training is in full swing now. I've been experiencing about 50% less pain this week so I'm full of smiles and happily doing my band exercises at home and at work... getting some interesting looks from people as I practice balance drills in my cubicle... I'm now kind of optimistic that perhaps by April I will be back on the road to some degree of triathlon-related activity.
What are YOU training for?
Monday, January 16, 2012
January 2012 - A Month of Refocus
Here we are in January - and all anyone seems to be talking about is their upcoming race season... I know, I know... the time flies by and we must be prepared for those early season races... I'm just jealous!
I never even imagined that I would not be running by now when this hip initially gave out last April. I figured, as time went on, that I would be running by the end of May, then the end of last summer... then Hallowe'en... then Christmas... the hopeful dates of return to sport came and went without much fanfare.
January is now here and I am officially 'not training' - I even had to cancel my coaching sessions because let's face it - I can't run or bike right now without extruciating pain. It's very frustrating. However, the good news, I guess, is that my new focus is REHAB. Serious, full-time rehab without any half-assed attempts at riding or running, since all it amounts to is another setback.
I've been told that '2012 will be a good year' by my physiotherapist. I'm not sure I really believe that as yet but I'm trying to keep an open mind. As I sit at my desk (NOT completely uncomfortable for the first time in about 2 months) I admit I'm feeling somewhat encouraged... :)
If I can sit at my desk pain-FREE by my birthday (the 26th) I will be ecstatic because that means I will be able to sit on my bike again (she's gathering dust on a wall rack and I feel miserably guilty every day when I go home and see her hanging there).
So, in the spirit of being happy for others and what they are doing... tell me: what races do YOU have coming up? Are you planning your first Ironman or your first try-a-tri or half-marathon or what..?
I shall attempt to live vicariously through your sporting endeavours... for now at least...
;)
I never even imagined that I would not be running by now when this hip initially gave out last April. I figured, as time went on, that I would be running by the end of May, then the end of last summer... then Hallowe'en... then Christmas... the hopeful dates of return to sport came and went without much fanfare.
January is now here and I am officially 'not training' - I even had to cancel my coaching sessions because let's face it - I can't run or bike right now without extruciating pain. It's very frustrating. However, the good news, I guess, is that my new focus is REHAB. Serious, full-time rehab without any half-assed attempts at riding or running, since all it amounts to is another setback.
I've been told that '2012 will be a good year' by my physiotherapist. I'm not sure I really believe that as yet but I'm trying to keep an open mind. As I sit at my desk (NOT completely uncomfortable for the first time in about 2 months) I admit I'm feeling somewhat encouraged... :)
If I can sit at my desk pain-FREE by my birthday (the 26th) I will be ecstatic because that means I will be able to sit on my bike again (she's gathering dust on a wall rack and I feel miserably guilty every day when I go home and see her hanging there).
So, in the spirit of being happy for others and what they are doing... tell me: what races do YOU have coming up? Are you planning your first Ironman or your first try-a-tri or half-marathon or what..?
I shall attempt to live vicariously through your sporting endeavours... for now at least...
;)
Friday, December 30, 2011
Out With the Old...
I've never understood the whole concept of celebration and partying on New Year's Eve. I mean, I get the concept of celebrating what's to come but for me, this time is all about reflection over the year that's ending.
Hard to believe 2011 is almost over. The year has flown by, as they tend to do as we age. It's hard to believe I've been rehabbing the same, nagging injury for 9 months now. It's hard to believe I have not imploded from frustration as yet... there have been many dark days when I felt alternately depressed, angry or hopeless.
I've had mood swings from elation at being able to run for 5 minutes at a time to being certain that I'm too old and broken to pursue this sport and might as well quit my training dreams and be done with it...
It wasn't a year of notable personal athletic pursuits or achievements. Very disappointing, considering how promising things were looking right up until about March 2011.
Ah well, such is life... it's times like these that have a way of teaching you to appreciate the other things that happen along the way.
As I was slogging out my exercises in physio the other day, I glanced over and saw a young woman in a wheelchair who had no use of her legs. She was smiling and happy as she did her upper body and core exercises with her therapist and she was so grateful to be able to do so successfully. I smiled with her.
I guess that was my miracle for the day. It made me feel very humble and small-minded to be bitter about my hip/groin injury keeping me from running and biking when instead, I have a lot to be grateful for in my life and I need to remember to appreciate every ounce of it.
As I left the clinic I had a bit of a bounce back in my gait and wished that woman well in my heart as I said a silent 'Thank you' to her for the lesson.
Moving forward, I really hope that 2012 brings a year of happiness and good health for all.
Happy New Year - one and all!
Hard to believe 2011 is almost over. The year has flown by, as they tend to do as we age. It's hard to believe I've been rehabbing the same, nagging injury for 9 months now. It's hard to believe I have not imploded from frustration as yet... there have been many dark days when I felt alternately depressed, angry or hopeless.
I've had mood swings from elation at being able to run for 5 minutes at a time to being certain that I'm too old and broken to pursue this sport and might as well quit my training dreams and be done with it...
It wasn't a year of notable personal athletic pursuits or achievements. Very disappointing, considering how promising things were looking right up until about March 2011.
Ah well, such is life... it's times like these that have a way of teaching you to appreciate the other things that happen along the way.
As I was slogging out my exercises in physio the other day, I glanced over and saw a young woman in a wheelchair who had no use of her legs. She was smiling and happy as she did her upper body and core exercises with her therapist and she was so grateful to be able to do so successfully. I smiled with her.
I guess that was my miracle for the day. It made me feel very humble and small-minded to be bitter about my hip/groin injury keeping me from running and biking when instead, I have a lot to be grateful for in my life and I need to remember to appreciate every ounce of it.
As I left the clinic I had a bit of a bounce back in my gait and wished that woman well in my heart as I said a silent 'Thank you' to her for the lesson.
Moving forward, I really hope that 2012 brings a year of happiness and good health for all.
Happy New Year - one and all!
Friday, December 16, 2011
Seasonal Holiday Fare Has Lost It's Appeal...?
So, the season is upon us again! Do you remember when you were a little kid, how it always seemed to take SO LONG for Christmas to arrive each year? Now that you're an adult, it's more like, 'It's Christmas again - already??!'
It's that time of year when so many of us over-indulge in the abundance of seasonal fare and party foods and/or gatherings and parties... and we sabotage our otherwise healthy lifestyle.
I'm curious as to whether other like-minded people choose to remain (for the most part) on their regular diet and exercise regime or whether you just let it all hang out and go to hell in a handbasket for the week or two of holiday celebrations?
For me, I like the extra time off work to put towards extra workout sessions... it's so nice to not have to worry about getting up at 5am or getting to bed by 9pm in order to be able to function at the office... and still be able to enjoy quality workout sessions as well as enjoy leisure activities.
I enjoy the extra time off work when I can play in the kitchen and create something delicious for myself and others.
As much as I loathe the thought of sabotaging my nutritional plan (which is usually pretty clean) I admit I'm not immune to the allure of Scottish shortbread petticoat tails (I grew up in the UK...) or - heaven help me - if there is a fruitcake or a Christmas pudding in the vicinity - it's all over... but I've realized this year that even those well-loved indulgences just don't sit well with me anymore.
Could it be that my tastebuds are changing for these once much anticipated once yearly special treats? Oh... a part of me is crying inside as I write this... I (sob) did not enjoy the shortbread this morning! I dutifully ate it as I had pulled it from the tin with my bare hands... but - yuk! I have no idea why this happened. I'm now afraid to go looking for a traditional fruitcake recipe or friend who baked one... in case that, too, ends up falling flat in my mouth.
I wonder whether all of my months of baking cookies and cakes for other people has finally just culminated in a general apathy towards sweets for me personally? Sigh...
I should be happy - I know! I don't pig out on these (forbidden) foods anyway - but gee - it would be nice to enjoy those small indulgences rather than just thinking 'eww... I should have had vegetables'.
So... I guess I'm going to have to start a new holiday tradition this year: gold cake sparkles on mashed sweet potato and brussels sprouts with green edible glitter... after all, there is no reason why it shouldn't LOOK festive... even though it's not traditionally found on a sweet table...
I'm getting old... (or wiser... or something...)
Hmmpf...
It's that time of year when so many of us over-indulge in the abundance of seasonal fare and party foods and/or gatherings and parties... and we sabotage our otherwise healthy lifestyle.
I'm curious as to whether other like-minded people choose to remain (for the most part) on their regular diet and exercise regime or whether you just let it all hang out and go to hell in a handbasket for the week or two of holiday celebrations?
For me, I like the extra time off work to put towards extra workout sessions... it's so nice to not have to worry about getting up at 5am or getting to bed by 9pm in order to be able to function at the office... and still be able to enjoy quality workout sessions as well as enjoy leisure activities.
I enjoy the extra time off work when I can play in the kitchen and create something delicious for myself and others.
As much as I loathe the thought of sabotaging my nutritional plan (which is usually pretty clean) I admit I'm not immune to the allure of Scottish shortbread petticoat tails (I grew up in the UK...) or - heaven help me - if there is a fruitcake or a Christmas pudding in the vicinity - it's all over... but I've realized this year that even those well-loved indulgences just don't sit well with me anymore.
Could it be that my tastebuds are changing for these once much anticipated once yearly special treats? Oh... a part of me is crying inside as I write this... I (sob) did not enjoy the shortbread this morning! I dutifully ate it as I had pulled it from the tin with my bare hands... but - yuk! I have no idea why this happened. I'm now afraid to go looking for a traditional fruitcake recipe or friend who baked one... in case that, too, ends up falling flat in my mouth.
I wonder whether all of my months of baking cookies and cakes for other people has finally just culminated in a general apathy towards sweets for me personally? Sigh...
I should be happy - I know! I don't pig out on these (forbidden) foods anyway - but gee - it would be nice to enjoy those small indulgences rather than just thinking 'eww... I should have had vegetables'.
So... I guess I'm going to have to start a new holiday tradition this year: gold cake sparkles on mashed sweet potato and brussels sprouts with green edible glitter... after all, there is no reason why it shouldn't LOOK festive... even though it's not traditionally found on a sweet table...
I'm getting old... (or wiser... or something...)
Hmmpf...
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
7th Annual Santa Speedo Run - Toronto
The Toronto Santa Speedo Run is a fun event that runs every year in downtown Toronto - to the delight and dismay of many shoppers, store merchants and motorists... It's not a race... it's a 3km run through the downtown area, dressed in only a red Speedo (festive adornments are permitted).
Once again, Eric and I undressed for success (or something...) to run through Yorkville, amid the gawkers and the photographers - all for the purpose of raising funds for the Sick Kids' Hospital Toys and Games Fund.
The best part of this event? Every single penny goes to the charity - nothing is kept by the organizers or advertizers!
This year was by far the coldest Speedo Run we've ever taken part in... it was below zero and the wind felt like it bit into our skin as we rounded the corners... there were a lot of rosy cheeks this year...
Thank you to all of my sponsors for their very generous donations to this worthy cause! (Even though I realize that you likely just like to see me make a fool of myself each year and are willing to pay for that... which I'm okay with! It's for charity, after all...)
The Festive Season is upon us! HO! HO!! HO!!!
Once again, Eric and I undressed for success (or something...) to run through Yorkville, amid the gawkers and the photographers - all for the purpose of raising funds for the Sick Kids' Hospital Toys and Games Fund.
The best part of this event? Every single penny goes to the charity - nothing is kept by the organizers or advertizers!
This year was by far the coldest Speedo Run we've ever taken part in... it was below zero and the wind felt like it bit into our skin as we rounded the corners... there were a lot of rosy cheeks this year...
A good time was had by all - as usual!
Thank you to all of my sponsors for their very generous donations to this worthy cause! (Even though I realize that you likely just like to see me make a fool of myself each year and are willing to pay for that... which I'm okay with! It's for charity, after all...)
The Festive Season is upon us! HO! HO!! HO!!!
Monday, December 5, 2011
Lost in Reflection... Again...
It seems that at this time of year, we say goodbye to many around us. The holidays can be a time of celebration for many and yet at the same time, a time to remember, a time to pause and reflect and - on occasion - a time of great sadness.
Once again, I write from a place of quiet reflection. Today, the mother of one of my oldest and dearest friends, left this world.
Michelle and I have been friends for 35 years and I have known her mother since I was a wee girl of 11. As I think of Jacqueline, I remember a petite lady (not so unlike my own departed mother) who was a surrogate mum figure when I was at her house, visiting my friend. I remember her voice and her lovely German accent like it was only yesterday. I remember that she talked to me and listened when I shared things with her. I remember that she genuinely cared.
I didn't see her much when I grew into my 20's and moved away, yet she remembered me and sent me a wedding gift, along with her good wishes on the day that I married.
I heard of her through Michelle over the years and knew that Alzheimer's had claimed her, as with so many others. I cannot imagine the pain that must be felt when your own mother no longer remembers you. I lost my mother when I was just 24 years old but she knew me up until the time that she left this world.
As I sit and remember our childhood, the games we played, the TV shows that we watched and the things that we talked about while growing from grade 5 schoolgirls into pre-teens, then into teenagers and finally - into the women that we would become - wives and mothers - it seems unfathomable that Michelle and I are now close to the ages that our respective mothers were when she and I became friends so long ago.
Time is passing us by so quickly. Thirty-plus years have melded into memories that ebb and flow... friendships and relationships that have grown apart then grown back together, ultimately withstanding the test of time.
Once again, I am lost in my own thoughts as I hear those around me repeating, 'I'm too busy', 'I don't have time' - to the question, 'When are we going to get together over the holidays?' We can be so quick to dismiss time with those closest to us, thinking that we will always have plenty of time to do it... someday. Only 'someday' doesn't always arrive...
I'd give anything to be able to see my mum and talk to her and hug her close and tell her that I love her. I would bet that Michelle would say the same thing.
If you have the opportunity to spend time with loved ones - do it! They might annoy or infuriate you sometimes... and delight you at others... but don't waste the time that we have been given. Time passes quickly and before you know it - that opportunity is gone...
Once again, I write from a place of quiet reflection. Today, the mother of one of my oldest and dearest friends, left this world.
Michelle and I have been friends for 35 years and I have known her mother since I was a wee girl of 11. As I think of Jacqueline, I remember a petite lady (not so unlike my own departed mother) who was a surrogate mum figure when I was at her house, visiting my friend. I remember her voice and her lovely German accent like it was only yesterday. I remember that she talked to me and listened when I shared things with her. I remember that she genuinely cared.
I didn't see her much when I grew into my 20's and moved away, yet she remembered me and sent me a wedding gift, along with her good wishes on the day that I married.
I heard of her through Michelle over the years and knew that Alzheimer's had claimed her, as with so many others. I cannot imagine the pain that must be felt when your own mother no longer remembers you. I lost my mother when I was just 24 years old but she knew me up until the time that she left this world.
As I sit and remember our childhood, the games we played, the TV shows that we watched and the things that we talked about while growing from grade 5 schoolgirls into pre-teens, then into teenagers and finally - into the women that we would become - wives and mothers - it seems unfathomable that Michelle and I are now close to the ages that our respective mothers were when she and I became friends so long ago.
Time is passing us by so quickly. Thirty-plus years have melded into memories that ebb and flow... friendships and relationships that have grown apart then grown back together, ultimately withstanding the test of time.
Once again, I am lost in my own thoughts as I hear those around me repeating, 'I'm too busy', 'I don't have time' - to the question, 'When are we going to get together over the holidays?' We can be so quick to dismiss time with those closest to us, thinking that we will always have plenty of time to do it... someday. Only 'someday' doesn't always arrive...
I'd give anything to be able to see my mum and talk to her and hug her close and tell her that I love her. I would bet that Michelle would say the same thing.
If you have the opportunity to spend time with loved ones - do it! They might annoy or infuriate you sometimes... and delight you at others... but don't waste the time that we have been given. Time passes quickly and before you know it - that opportunity is gone...
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Feel the Love Inside and Express It Outwards
It's been a sad week... I got word that a friend of mine died very suddenly while in Florida last week. Rolf had just driven himself down there to spend 5 months relaxing (not working, as in previous years) and taking some time to be kind to himself. As I understand it, he felt ill upon returning to his hotel room after dinner and called 911. He arrested in the ambulance en route to the hospital and could not be revived. He left this world so suddenly and none of us had a chance to say 'Goodbye'.
I wonder what his last thoughts were. I wonder if he knew that he was loved. I hope so.
I know that his path was not always smooth. I know that he had many experiences in his past that helped shape him and the directions that he chose were not always those that others - not in his shoes - would have chosen for themselves or for him.
As I think of him, I remember a man who smiled from his heart and it touched his eyes. He brought me flowers when he came to dinner. He made me feel 'special' whenever he was around just by letting his inner charm shine outwards. It was impossible not to like him.
He leaves behind many people who knew him and loved him - for all his quirks and successes and failures - for better or for worse - he was Rolf... and now he's no longer with us.
How many times have we known inside of ourselves that we love another person - be it a friend, lover, family member... or go a little farther outwards - to your co-workers, students, teachers, acquaintances... but never said or done anything about it?
In my yoga practice and teachings, I encourage and try to foster connection within the heart and mind. Connection with Self. Connection with Source. Many of us do this in our own ways.
Feeling the love inside of us - connecting with that inner beauty and spirit that live within each one of us - is powerful - but it can't stop there - you have to express it outwards and share it with those around you. Maybe you say 'I love you'. Perhaps you share of yourself selflessly with another, or practice random acts of kindness with no expectation of reciprocity... give a hug to a person who needs one... go for a walk and chat with someone who is having a low day... in other words, share yourself. Share your light with another's light and one by one, illuminate the world around you.
I don't believe that death is the end. I do believe that when I am ready to leave this world, I wish to be free of regrets for things not said or done when I had the opportunity. I wish to be at peace.
Be kind to yourselves, my friends. Tell those around you that you love them and cherish the time you have together.
- Namaste
I wonder what his last thoughts were. I wonder if he knew that he was loved. I hope so.
I know that his path was not always smooth. I know that he had many experiences in his past that helped shape him and the directions that he chose were not always those that others - not in his shoes - would have chosen for themselves or for him.
As I think of him, I remember a man who smiled from his heart and it touched his eyes. He brought me flowers when he came to dinner. He made me feel 'special' whenever he was around just by letting his inner charm shine outwards. It was impossible not to like him.
He leaves behind many people who knew him and loved him - for all his quirks and successes and failures - for better or for worse - he was Rolf... and now he's no longer with us.
How many times have we known inside of ourselves that we love another person - be it a friend, lover, family member... or go a little farther outwards - to your co-workers, students, teachers, acquaintances... but never said or done anything about it?
In my yoga practice and teachings, I encourage and try to foster connection within the heart and mind. Connection with Self. Connection with Source. Many of us do this in our own ways.
Feeling the love inside of us - connecting with that inner beauty and spirit that live within each one of us - is powerful - but it can't stop there - you have to express it outwards and share it with those around you. Maybe you say 'I love you'. Perhaps you share of yourself selflessly with another, or practice random acts of kindness with no expectation of reciprocity... give a hug to a person who needs one... go for a walk and chat with someone who is having a low day... in other words, share yourself. Share your light with another's light and one by one, illuminate the world around you.
I don't believe that death is the end. I do believe that when I am ready to leave this world, I wish to be free of regrets for things not said or done when I had the opportunity. I wish to be at peace.
Be kind to yourselves, my friends. Tell those around you that you love them and cherish the time you have together.
- Namaste
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Indian Summer Has Come and Gone...
What an incredible weekend we had in Toronto! The temperatures were in the mid-to high 20's and the sun was shining gloriously on the changing leaves!
A fabulous time of year to enjoy outdoor pursuits - biking, running... and enjoy the changing of the season.
I hope that everyone managed to get out there and enjoy some of that beautiful weekend - in between turkey dinners... ;)
This weekend I'm looking forward to heading up to Mono Hills for some trail running (or likely a trail walk as not really running yet...) and enjoy some beautiful scenery up there!
Have a fabulous week everyone!
A fabulous time of year to enjoy outdoor pursuits - biking, running... and enjoy the changing of the season.
I hope that everyone managed to get out there and enjoy some of that beautiful weekend - in between turkey dinners... ;)
This weekend I'm looking forward to heading up to Mono Hills for some trail running (or likely a trail walk as not really running yet...) and enjoy some beautiful scenery up there!
Have a fabulous week everyone!
Friday, October 7, 2011
A Time To Give Thanks...
As I was sitting at my desk today, a song came on the radio that I haven't heard in ages. When I was 15 I had a boyfriend and this was 'our' song - "Heroes" by David Bowie.
I was transported back to a time when my hair was long, all of my friends smoked (various substances), junk food was a way of life... we had house parties and field parties and went to rock concerts and later on - bars... we loitered in places because we had nowhere to go and nothing much to do - unless it was rollerskating... Swimming was unheard of, my 10-speed didn't get much use and running was something I did to get out of the way of the other girls when we played field hockey in gym class...
Thirty years has passed since that time. Where did all that time go? What happened to that young teenage girl (who thought she was grown up) who dreamed of doing something great but had no idea what that would be? All those times people would ask 'what do you want to do when you graduate?' 'What do you see yourself doing for the next 5-10 years?' - Hell - I had no clue what I saw myself doing back then... becoming a secretary, finding a husband and I supposed having children and living in a little house...? Why? - what was everyone else doing??
Little did I know then that someday I would be sitting here, writing this blog about all of the fun and exciting things that make up my life today. That young girl had no clue of all of the wondrous adventures that were to come.
I watched all of my friends get married and have children and live in houses while I couldn't figure out what was 'wrong' with me because I had none of those things. I didn't seem to fit the mould that I thought I should. So instead, I found the gym and immersed myself in bodybuilding and aerobics for a couple of decades and then some...
I watched my friends - some of them stayed married although most did not - as the years went by and spouses changed, babies were born and grew into childhood and now - adulthood...
I finally found my soulmate - at age 40. Better late than never, eh? ;)
Here I sit, 45 years old, listening to 'oldies' on the radio - feeling a little nostalgic for my youth but feeling more than anything, an immense sense of gratitude for all of the people and things that I have/have had in my life that made and continue to make it so rich and wonderful! I'm so glad that I never settled for the limited dreams of my 15 year old self...
I have a life that is filled with good people, actually great people - who continue to encourage me and one another to try new things and experience more out of life. Age is not a limiter!
I am so grateful for Eric, who is always my cheerleader. He only smiles when I take on some new task with my typical 'How hard could it be?' line...
I am so grateful to my friends and coach and training partners who continue to encourage me even on days when I feel middle-aged and slow and rather stupid for wanting to take on more...
Thank you. All of you.
Happy Thanksgiving.
I was transported back to a time when my hair was long, all of my friends smoked (various substances), junk food was a way of life... we had house parties and field parties and went to rock concerts and later on - bars... we loitered in places because we had nowhere to go and nothing much to do - unless it was rollerskating... Swimming was unheard of, my 10-speed didn't get much use and running was something I did to get out of the way of the other girls when we played field hockey in gym class...
Thirty years has passed since that time. Where did all that time go? What happened to that young teenage girl (who thought she was grown up) who dreamed of doing something great but had no idea what that would be? All those times people would ask 'what do you want to do when you graduate?' 'What do you see yourself doing for the next 5-10 years?' - Hell - I had no clue what I saw myself doing back then... becoming a secretary, finding a husband and I supposed having children and living in a little house...? Why? - what was everyone else doing??
Little did I know then that someday I would be sitting here, writing this blog about all of the fun and exciting things that make up my life today. That young girl had no clue of all of the wondrous adventures that were to come.
I watched all of my friends get married and have children and live in houses while I couldn't figure out what was 'wrong' with me because I had none of those things. I didn't seem to fit the mould that I thought I should. So instead, I found the gym and immersed myself in bodybuilding and aerobics for a couple of decades and then some...
I watched my friends - some of them stayed married although most did not - as the years went by and spouses changed, babies were born and grew into childhood and now - adulthood...
I finally found my soulmate - at age 40. Better late than never, eh? ;)
Here I sit, 45 years old, listening to 'oldies' on the radio - feeling a little nostalgic for my youth but feeling more than anything, an immense sense of gratitude for all of the people and things that I have/have had in my life that made and continue to make it so rich and wonderful! I'm so glad that I never settled for the limited dreams of my 15 year old self...
I have a life that is filled with good people, actually great people - who continue to encourage me and one another to try new things and experience more out of life. Age is not a limiter!
I am so grateful for Eric, who is always my cheerleader. He only smiles when I take on some new task with my typical 'How hard could it be?' line...
I am so grateful to my friends and coach and training partners who continue to encourage me even on days when I feel middle-aged and slow and rather stupid for wanting to take on more...
Thank you. All of you.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Friday, September 23, 2011
Sniff... It's Over... !
Yes, summer is officially over as of 5:04am today. Oh well. It's a bit too chilly to swim in the lake right now anyway... brrrr....
Onward we must go - to the season that I love - FALL! Ah, yes, the cooler, crisp air, the swirling leaves on the ground and in the air... the smell of the trails... I LOVE IT!
I admit that last week I was in a bit of a funk, thinking about the summer that was - without any racing or running... but this week, I have a whole new, fresh outlook.
I RAN. Yep! First time in 5 months!
Was it a long run? - Nope. 6 whole minutes on a treadmill
Was it fast? - Hell no - it was set at 3.8-4.5 mph
Was it a long, open stride? LOL! It was more like a tiny dog, moving it's legs in a very VERY fast trot with teensy steps!
Did it feel good? - OMG - you have NO idea how good it felt!!
It's amazing how quickly we forget what how much we have to be grateful for, especially when overachieving, OCD, A-personality types like (most athletes) us, suffer an injury that sidelines us from the activities that we love.
I feel renewed! I RAN! I was beaming as I went upstairs, filled out my Training Peaks log for my coach and then proceeded to send emails to several people. I RAN! I RAN!! WOO HOO!!!!!! I'M A SUPERSTAR! ... you get the point...
Anyway, this is not something I can yet repeat on a daily or even a bi-weekly basis at this point in rehab - but for now - I'll take it!
It's a beautiful day - get out there! :)
Onward we must go - to the season that I love - FALL! Ah, yes, the cooler, crisp air, the swirling leaves on the ground and in the air... the smell of the trails... I LOVE IT!
I admit that last week I was in a bit of a funk, thinking about the summer that was - without any racing or running... but this week, I have a whole new, fresh outlook.
I RAN. Yep! First time in 5 months!
Was it a long run? - Nope. 6 whole minutes on a treadmill
Was it fast? - Hell no - it was set at 3.8-4.5 mph
Was it a long, open stride? LOL! It was more like a tiny dog, moving it's legs in a very VERY fast trot with teensy steps!
Did it feel good? - OMG - you have NO idea how good it felt!!
It's amazing how quickly we forget what how much we have to be grateful for, especially when overachieving, OCD, A-personality types like (most athletes) us, suffer an injury that sidelines us from the activities that we love.
I feel renewed! I RAN! I was beaming as I went upstairs, filled out my Training Peaks log for my coach and then proceeded to send emails to several people. I RAN! I RAN!! WOO HOO!!!!!! I'M A SUPERSTAR! ... you get the point...
Anyway, this is not something I can yet repeat on a daily or even a bi-weekly basis at this point in rehab - but for now - I'll take it!
It's a beautiful day - get out there! :)
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
REV3 - Cedar Point
This past weekend we drove to Sandusky, Ohio for the Rev3 races.
What a blast!!
There were about 16 of us down there from the Toronto area and a great time was had by all.
The race itself was very professionally run and no one had any complaints. Most of the racers are planning to race there again!
There were definitely some small touches by the Rev3 people that really hit home with our racers. One of which was the race numbers which were temporary tattoos! I have to admit, they look much more professional in the photos than a number scrawled with a sharpie ;) They also provided 'fun' temporary tattoos for the racers...
Bike racks are also different - you slide your front wheel into a floor rack which holds your bike upright and no need to fret about your handlebars or brake hoods hanging over the typically seen bike rack. In addition to that, the Rev3 people give each racer a nameplate at their bike rack where they are to put their bikes. A really nice, professional touch! (The pros actually got posters of themselves at their rack sites!)
I went to the practice swim in Lake Erie on Saturday morning - had to wade through 2' of MUD to get into the water - I kid you not! LOL! It was a riot!
The theme of the park is Peanuts... well, I'll tell ya, anyone who went for a dip on Saturday morning, came out looking like Pigpen!!
The water itself, although you could not see your hand enter the water, didn't taste bad and was quite pleasant in temperature. Cool but not cold. My toes were chilly and never did warm up but apparently I'm an oddity that way...
I hear that the bike course is scenic and very nice. The run course left a bit to be desired as apparently it is not very scenic but overall, everyone really enjoyed this venue.
We will be back there next September as I will be racing the half-iron distance (I deferred it from this year) and I think we'll have an even bigger showing of Toronto friends next season!
What a blast!!
There were about 16 of us down there from the Toronto area and a great time was had by all.
The race itself was very professionally run and no one had any complaints. Most of the racers are planning to race there again!
There were definitely some small touches by the Rev3 people that really hit home with our racers. One of which was the race numbers which were temporary tattoos! I have to admit, they look much more professional in the photos than a number scrawled with a sharpie ;) They also provided 'fun' temporary tattoos for the racers...
Bike racks are also different - you slide your front wheel into a floor rack which holds your bike upright and no need to fret about your handlebars or brake hoods hanging over the typically seen bike rack. In addition to that, the Rev3 people give each racer a nameplate at their bike rack where they are to put their bikes. A really nice, professional touch! (The pros actually got posters of themselves at their rack sites!)
I went to the practice swim in Lake Erie on Saturday morning - had to wade through 2' of MUD to get into the water - I kid you not! LOL! It was a riot!
The theme of the park is Peanuts... well, I'll tell ya, anyone who went for a dip on Saturday morning, came out looking like Pigpen!!
The water itself, although you could not see your hand enter the water, didn't taste bad and was quite pleasant in temperature. Cool but not cold. My toes were chilly and never did warm up but apparently I'm an oddity that way...
I hear that the bike course is scenic and very nice. The run course left a bit to be desired as apparently it is not very scenic but overall, everyone really enjoyed this venue.
We will be back there next September as I will be racing the half-iron distance (I deferred it from this year) and I think we'll have an even bigger showing of Toronto friends next season!
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